"When in Rome, do as the Romans do," you've probably heard of this famous proverb before. I am not comfortable with this concept at all. Wherever I am, I will be who I am, and I don't want to act exactly same as people there do just because I'm there. However, I think you can accept their idea if you like it. After three and half years staying in US, I was pretty much Americanized. Not all, but I liked their culture especially the idea of respecting equality, identity, and freedom. Now, I am no longer submissive, domestic, quiet girl. Instead, I have my own opinion, confident of what I am doing, and equality is one of my favorite words now. I brought that culture back to Japan with me, and that bothered many Japanese people. In evidence, I couldn't get along with some of my friends who I used to be comfortable with more than my family. Anyway, that's how the life goes, then there is nothing I can do about it except changing myself back to who I was when I was in Japan, which is much more difficult to do than dancing naked in front of 100 people for me?c so I decided to be who I am, and if you are not comfortable with me, too bad. That was what I decided before.
However, working in Japan is much more complicated than living in Japan. Though I am working at an American company, most of the employees are Japanese. Therefore, of course, they expect me to do in Japanese way. Not as strongly as Japanese companies though. I've heard that some Japanese companies are taking very conservative way, such as girls have to do men's miscellaneous tasks or serve them tea or something like that. However, I still do feel frustrated sometimes with my co-workers. The other day, I was talking with my boss. He is really cool person, and we are very close to each other. I guess he is so comfortable to talk with for me because he is not typical Japanese. But my co-workers told me to have more distance between us. They said, "He is not your friend. You have to understand that." I know my boss is really in important position, but so what? I like him. He is so fun. I do consider his situation. I have never interrupted him when he is busy. What I really cannot understand is why he can't be my friend. I like him as a person. He is a wonderful human being. My boss then told my co-workers that he really didn't care, but he appreciates their concern. My co-workers said he was just being polite, and actually he does mind. I don't know if they are right or wrong, but I guess finally I realized I was in Japan. I guess this is part of my job to listen to them and follow their rule. If not, I can't work here. If you are not familiar with Japanese culture, you might think this is ridiculous because I thought so too. But this is actually happening. Because I am Japanese, they expect me to act like one no matter if I want to or not.
So from next week, I decided to change. I will do in their way at work. This is not easy thing to do, but I don't really have time and energy to argue about it, which is completely meaningless because I'm going to lose. Just this incident made me want to go back to US so badly. I know this country is not for me for sure. If I keep living in here, I might be back to who I was, unconfident, scared of everything, and don't have no identity whatsoever, who is the human that I despise more than anybody else.